Andy Burnham could learn a few lessons from a previous Labour government in the pre-privatisation era on how to tackle water shortages, writes KEITH FLETT
Bingo and booze? Bollocks.
PADDY McGUFFIN takes a break from from the bingo halls to give his take on the Budget
"Well I think that went jolly well! Fifth time lucky what? A few more strokes of genius like that and we'll be out of this recession in a jiffy!"
"And how exactly do you calculate that, Gideon? Actually, don't calculate anything. That's what got us into all this trouble in the first place."
"(Smirk) I think you'll find that was Labour, Dave."
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