MAYER WAKEFIELD has reservations about the direction of a play centered on a DVLA re-training session for three British-Pakistani motorists
Requiem for free musical movement
At 11pm on December 31, an important part of my life in the form I choose to live it came to an end

BEFORE 1992 and open borders I always toured mainland Europe solo as a poet and acoustic performer, although I had long thought of forming a band to play my songs.
My experiences crossing borders with other bands — the ludicrous, petty nonsense to which we were subjected for no good reason whatsoever, simply because we were punk musicians — meant that I stuck to my solo poems and songs and the minimal, though constant, nonsense I experienced travelling alone with a hand-held mandola and a rucksack full of merch.
The irony about border checks is that I have never taken illegal drugs. I have never smoked and hate pills and injections. I prefer beer.
More from this author

Given the global plague of Agent Orange, the bard channels his energy into community self-help

In which we accompany the Bard into Cymru to meet his musical accomplices, young and old

The bard ditches an unspecial relationship, encounters a new subdivision of metal, and discovers the cure for a stiff neck

The bard tunes into the message crooned by the newly self-appointed masters of the universe